Voicemail - What funny lines can I record for myself for my voicemail?

What funny lines can I record for myself for my voicemail?

I want to re-record my voicemail for my cell phone, but I don't know what kind of funny (real) lines I could use. I still want for people to leave my messages, I just want it to be funny. (Please, nothing I have to say in any kind of accent!)

Public Comments

Say: Hello, hello, HELLO, jus kiddin ... then teel them wat u wanna say
"Hi, this is *your name*'s celphone. I'm not here right now, coz I'm busy trying to take over the world. Please leave a message before I get back. BEEP!!!"
You could sing the we will rock you song, but instead of singing, "We will we will rock you." Sing, "We will we will call you back." It is really funny.
ok start with laughing like this in different pitches.. "Heheheh .(Pause)..heheheh.(Pause)..kekekek .(pause)..kekekkekekekekek OH i'm just Laughing just record your crap punk!!! (laugh again loudly) HAHHAHAHAHAAHHA" (finished) is that enough or contact me for few more...i can make for you! ;)
ok . start off with diffrent voice saying..... hello.. this is (your name) secretary how may i help u today... then go.. nah just kiddin please leave a message